Since the moment those two fuchsia lines appeared on your home pregnancy test, you have been in a state of turmoil. Pregnant, worried, and unsure where to turn, you have been weighing all of your options. And one possibility is adoption.
Here are a few tips that will help you explore and navigate the adoption process.
Before entering in to this important decision, you will need to do some soul-searching in order to determine if adoption is the right choice for you. This involves examining your belief system, your personal situation, and being honest about your feelings. You must also consider the fact that you are giving up all legal rights to your child to the prospective adoptive parents.
One method that may help with the decision-making process is to try to imagine how you will feel after each scenario–giving the baby up for adoption or bringing your baby home with you. This will not only help you decide which choice is best for you, but it will also help you prepare in advance for your emotional reaction.
Don’t act until you have reached a decision with which you are comfortable. And don’t be persuaded by the wishes of others. They don’t have to live with your decision.
Contact an Agency
If adoption sounds like the right path for you, your health provider will likely be able to refer you to a reputable licensed adoption agency for more information. This agency will be able to provide you with the answers to all of your questions about the process. You may also wish to contact an adoption attorney.
Choose the Type of Adoption
There are different types of adoptions that you will need to familiarize yourself with in order to select the one that’s best for you and your child.
If you have adopted a child or are considering doing so, here are a few ways to tell a child that they are adopted.
Choosing Your Baby’s Family
With the increased popularity of open adoptions, it has become common for biological mothers to “get to know” or even choose the adoptive parents. Many reputable agencies have pre-screened prospective parent profiles that you can select from. You can, then, meet them through a variety of ways including mediated telephone exchanges, meetings, or doctors’ visits. You could also opt to have your agency or attorney make a selection on your behalf.
Make Sure You’re Sure
It is still not a done deal. You will be provided with another opportunity to re-examine your decision upon the birth of your child. Depending on your location, you are required a “cooling off” period of 48 to 72 hours after your child’s birth before you can sign the adoption paperwork and finalize the adoption. Up until that point, you are still free to change your mind.
If you’d like to read one woman’s account of her adoption experience, check out I didn’t give my baby up, I gave him the best.
You will need the support of friends and family throughout the process to help you cope and to lend a listening ear. It is also wise to seek counseling in order to work through any emotions you experience. Support groups are also a great way to share with others who are going through the same thing.
Before reaching a decision of this magnitude, it is important that you examine and weigh your options carefully. And do what’s best for you and your baby.
Are you an adopted child who is grateful for the life that their biological parent gave them? We’d love to hear about your adoption experience.
Kimberley Laws is a regular contributor to HowDoYou.com and the author of two blogs, The Embiggens Project and Searching for Barry Weiss. A "Jill of all trades," she is a High School English Teacher and Certified Career Counselor with a background in makeup artistry, retail banking, and graphic design. She is also a scrapbooking, PEZ-collecting, car enthusiast who loves travelling and New York City.
Sep 25, 2013 1
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